Dereliction of duty

A) Army deserter turns up in Iraq
B) Mom-to-be charged with DUI
C) 911 dispatcher falls asleep during call

A) is fake.
A pregnant woman in — guess! — Florida was busted for driving drunk (B), and a Memphis 911 dispatcher was busted for falling asleep while responding to a robbery call (C) (Caller: “A guy took my keys from my townhouse…” Operator: “[Snoring]”).
See which headline is fake.

Dear old golden-rule days

A) Prank promotes sex, booze after prom
B) School offers class in text-message literature
C) Student 'Twitters' his way out of jail

B) is fake.

A letter distributed to parents at an Oregon school encouraged them to supply their kids with drugs and alcohol (A), and a one-word twitter message alerted a student's friends to his arrest in Egypt (C).
See which headline is fake.

Career hazards

A) Falling baby caught by postal worker
B) Pregnant bank teller shot in belly
C) Ad man trapped in office for 48 hours

C) is fake.
A postal worker in Albany caught a baby falling out of a second-story building (A), and a pregnant Indiana bank teller was shot in what officials called "an outrageous act of terrorism."
See which headline is fake.

Water, water everywhere

A) Man charged in holy-water pool scheme
B) Mystery water springs up in yard
C) Weird fish leave sea, spawn on beach

A) is fake.
A Florida homeowner is baffled by a mysterious hole gushing with water in Florida (B). ("He hopes someone can come out, take a look at it and help him before it gets bigger.") And hot video captures fish spawning en masse(C).
See which headline is fake.

Family law

A) Cops: Mom brought baby to robbery
B) Grandma's Disney trip leads to kidnapping charge
C) Aunt charged in murder too obese for jail

B) is fake.
A young mom toted her baby along on an armed bank robbery (A), and a half-ton woman was charged with murder (C).
See which headline is fake.

A stone's throw

A) Glenn Beck: $53 trillion asteroid heading our way
B) Police: Girl tried to rob store with rock
C) Sculptor crushed by boulder as he works

C) is fake
Glenn Beck warns of a coming disaster (disappointingly, the asteroid is metaphorical) (A), and a Nashville girl threw a rock at a convenience store clerk and then demanded money (B).
See which headline is fake.

Peril surrounds us

A) 2-year-old girl falls 45 feet down a well
B) Superman costume can't prevent mugging
C) Man drilling hole with gun kills wife

B) is fake.
Rescuers are attempting to pull Baby Jessica 2.0 from a well in India (A), and a Missouri man accidentally shot his wife while using a gun to drill a hole in their bedroom wall (C).
See which headline is fake.

Things are looking up

A) Man declared dead feels 'pretty good'
B) Automotive fuel efficiency suddenly sexy
C) Gruesome murders give town a tourism boost

C) is fake.
An Oklahoma man who was declared brain dead was saved from organ harvesting after he moved his foot and hand (A). And gas-guzzling cars are finally going out of style (B).
See which headline is fake.

Man + animal: Eat, pray, love

A) Woman, 66, nabs chicken store robber
B) Town unveils life-size statue of hero terrier
C) Couple wear sweaters from dead dogs' fur

B) is fake.

An elderly woman wrestled a would-be KFC robber to the ground in Washington (A), and a British couple conjured up a really creepy way of remembering their deceased pets (C). See which headline is fake.

Mistakes were made

A) Obit writer charged with murder
B) Could John Ritter have been saved?
C) Go-cart scalps woman during birthday party

A) is fake.
John Ritter (B) could still be with us now, according to lawyers. A 9-year-old's birthday went horribly wrong (C) for one mom, though at least she lived to tell the tale. See which headline is fake.