Kitchen confidential

A) Butter knife pulled from boy's head
B) Man sklorks down 420 oysters, wins
C) Beet sales up, thanks to "The Office"

C) is fake.
A Washington boy is recovering well after a butter knife thrown by an angry classmate (“I could see the handle of the butter knife, sticking out. That’s when I freaked out.”) (A), and a new champion was crowned at the Acme World Oyster Eating contest (B).